The 5 Love Languages & How We Keep Our Marriage Alive

I’ve been asked a few times on Instagram to share more about my marriage, including how things have changed since Vienna was born and ways Bryan and I make it work while juggling other responsibilities. So that’s what I’m here to talk about today!

For those of you who are new, Bryan and I met in 2009 while we were in college. We had mutual friends and pretty much hit it off right away. We got married in 2014 and had our baby girl Vienna this past February. A lot has changed in 9 years – ups, downs, and normal monotony of everyday life. 

Since having our baby, my “free” time has changed quite a bit. One night after Vienna was in bed, I was browsing Pinterest. You know how Pinterest works… you click on one pin, then another, then another, until somehow you’re at a completely random website. That’s how I stumbled upon The 5 Love Languages and the free online quiz. 

I’ll admit that at first glance I thought the whole Love Language thing was ridiculous. Why should I take a quiz to find out how I like to be loved? I know myself pretty well, right? Well, I was wrong. But I’ll get into that momentarily. Let’s back up for a moment, shall we?

First things first. The 5 Love Languages are the ways that people like to be loved. They are quality time, words of affirmation, receiving gifts, physical touch, and acts of service. You can take the online quiz and receive your love language profile which will explain your primary love language, what it means, and how you can use it to better communicate and bond with others. 

My Top 2 Love Languages

1. Quality Time: Sharing quality conversations and quality activities, undivided attention, and being there without distractions makes me feel special and loved. 
2. Words of Affirmation: Unsolicited compliments, and kind, positive words mean to world to me. 

Bryan’s Top 2 Love Languages

1. Quality Time: See above. 
2. Acts of Service: Bryan loves when I help around the house or ease the burden of some of his responsibilities.

It was very interesting to learn that both Bryan and I have the same main love language. I didn’t expect that result in a million years. Bryan and I are great for each other because we are different in many ways and we complement each other well. So when I realized that our results came back the same, I was shocked. 

What we implemented into our marriage since taking the quiz? We don’t use our phones during dinner or while watching TV, we split up nightly chores so we can spend more time together when we’re done, and most importantly we make a concerted effort to plan date nights. Date nights, in particular, are the hardest thing to do because it takes a lot of planning. But… since we both value our time together above all else, we’re making it a top priority.

In August, we went on our first date night alone since Vienna was born. A night out was very much needed. I called my sister and asked her which weekends she was available to watch Vienna for a few hours. Once I had the date nailed down, I made dinner reservations at one of our favorite restaurants, The Gables at Chadds Ford. We’ve been there a bunch of times, and I’ve even talked about our experiences here on the blog, so I knew it was a great choice. I added the date on our calendars and set reminders so I wouldn’t forget! 

Ann, the owner of The Gables, was kind enough to host us. We had an absolute blast. The night was filled with glasses of wine, a delicious cheese board, probably the best scallops I’ve ever had, and Ann’s AMAZING chocolate banana cake {which I get every single time I visit}.

I’m already planning our next night out in my head. Which restaurants should we try next? Send me a comment or Instagram DM and let me know!